Lately I have come to realise that living in this little flat is not so good for me. And it's not just that there is an inch of water under my ground floor apartment making it cold and a perfect microcosm for all types of wonderful and exotic mould.

Mainly, it's because I feel like I have become socially lazy, having hidden myself away from share-housing for too long. Like if I live by myself any longer I’m gonna become the crazy cat lady from the Simpsons who throws cats at people. I don’t want to be the crazy cat lady from the Simpsons who throws cats at people. I like cats, and as far as I can tell they like me too.

I mean, yeah I go out all the time and generally have a blast with friends and strangers. But I kind of miss coming home from work sometimes and actually having a conversation with another human being. That would be nice.

I have lived pretty much by myself now for almost 5 years (except for that brief and wonderful time that the lovely and funny Miss Doyle lived with me.....miss you pumpkin ) And I think thats about enough.

Before moving into this flat, I had lived with a total of 23 people in the space of 7 years. Most of those people started out as total strangers to me. It was fun getting to know all of them. It was frustrating having to live with the little things some of them did that pissed me off. It was agonising watching some of them go through the general trials and tribulations of life. But above all, it was interesting. Damn interesting. Much better than sitting around alone in a cold little flat, waiting for the weekend to roll around before you could have a chin-wag with your mates.

I liked coming home from work one night back in 1999 and finding that the lanky backpacker from Manchester had purchased a case of beer so that he could sit me down and teach me the rules of Rugby Union. I had no care to learn the rules, and had no idea why the game we were watching was so important. But the beer went down a treat. That night I also discovered that some of what I thought was unintelligible gibberish coming out of said backpackers mouth, were actually words said in a very thick Manchurian accent. The look on his face when I told him that, for the previous month or so I generally had no idea what he was saying, was absolutely priceless.

I loved that at my 21st birthday party there were people there representing almost every continent on earth. I had lived with most of them at some stage. And some of them I ended up living with later. But, bless their cotton socks, all of them bought me alcohol and got very drunk with me.

Sitting in the living room of one sharehouse and watching a carpet python eat a live baby chicken whilst on the phone to my mum, then trying to explain what that "peep-peep-peep-THUD" sound was that she could hear. Then going on to explain to her why there was a stoned tattooist in the background giggling like a schoolgirl. That was fun.

Theres just nothing like that when you live by yourself. There's no witty banter....No little household jokes. No coming home to find strange messages written on chalkboards about Barbie's questionable morals.

It's just me.

And when it's just me I get bored. So bored that I'm too bored to do anything half the time. So I sit and watch movies or whatever rubbish is on telly, or spend too much time on the interweb and playing compy games. And my house gets messy, cause theres only bored me to motivate me to clean it up, and by that stage I'm too bored to bother with self-motivation.

I need to get me out of this flat and into a share house.

Before I go stir crazy and start collecting lots of aero-dynamic cats.

In her youth, the Goddess Ishtar fell in love with Tammuz – the God of vegetation and agriculture. At the height of their romance, the smitten Tammuz made the flowers bloom and the harvests thrive.

So overwhelming was the rapture that this love caused, Tammuz soon exhausted his powers, and at the end of summer he collapsed and died, his soul traveling to the underworld. Here he was presided over by Ereshkigal; Ishtar’s sister, and the Queen of the Underworld.

In the world above. Ishtar was overcome with grief, bursting into lamentations for her lost lover. Her sorrow made the land grow cold, and all around, the trees lost their leaves She vowed to find Tammuz and to snatch him away from his sad abode and, with her faithful servant Ninshubur, she conceived a plan to descend to the underworld to rescue him.

Placing her crown upon her head and adorning herself with her finest robes and jewels, the great Goddess of love and fertility descended to the outer gates of the underworld. She turned to Ninshubur, who had travelled with her thus far, and said: “Sweet Ninshubur, I alone must go forward. I ask nothing more from you on this quest, but to wait three days. If by that time I have not returned, call upon my father Enki for help.” And she kissed Ninshubur and went alone towards the first gate.

Here, she was met by the gatekeeper, who barred her way and would not allow her passage until he had consulted with his mistress, Queen Ereshkigal. “My lady” the gatekeeper said as he knelt before his ruler. “A great and powerful Goddess, arrayed in splendour and with signs of authority awaits entry into your realm.”

Ereshkigal knew that it was her sister come to rescue her lover Tammuz, and became upset. Ishtar’s boldness and assumption she could change Tammuz’s fate challenged Ereshkigal’s authority over the souls of the dead. What right did Ishtar have to encroach on Her realm and defy Her laws?

“Gatekeeper.” Ordered Ereshkigal. “Allow my sister admittance, but only open each of the seven gates a mere crack and as she passes through each portal, remove an item of her finery as payment for passage”

The gatekeeper bowed low and went back to Ishtar to carry out his orders.

The first gate was opened just enough so that Ishtar could squeeze her body through, the stones on either side of the opening cut and bruised her body. As she passed through the Gatekeeper removed her glorious crown from atop her head.

At the second gate the process was repeated, this time the gatekeeper removed the pendants from her ears. At the third gate she was relieved of the necklace from her throat; at the fourth her shimmering jewelled breastplate; the fifth gate saw her lose her girdle adorned with birthstones; at the sixth she relinquished the bracelets on her wrists and ankles; and at the seventh and final gate, Ishtar was stripped of the robes that covered her nakedness.

Thus, divested of all her possessions, of the very things that tied her to the world above, she arrived in the presence of Ereshkigal.

Enraged at her sisters intrusion, Ereshkigal ordered the judges of the underworld to surround Ishtar. “You have entered my realm uninvited Sister.” Boomed Ereshkigal “Surely you know that all who enter this land must be judged?”

Ishtar bowed her head “This I understand dear Sister.” She said. “I come here for love and wish only to rescue Tammuz, the one who has my heart”

Ereshkigal let out a derisive laugh and looked to her judges. They gave their ruling – Ishtar must die, and her body kept in the underworld.

Then Ereshkigal fastened on Ishtar the eye of death and spoke against her the word of wrath. She struck her sister, killing her instantly and capturing her in the land of the dead.

Back at the outer gates of the underworld, Ninshubur’s fears grew with each passing hour. Finally, at the end of the third day, she raced backed to the world above and entreated an audience with Ishtar’s father Enki.

Enki saw the worry on the face of his daughters servant and grew immediately concerned. “What is it my child, what have you come to tell me?”

“Lord, your daughter Ishtar, She is trapped in the underworld!” Cried Ninshubur.

Enki flew into a fit of grief and, scraping the dirt from under his fingernails, he created two beings, neither male nor female. “Go!” He ordered them “Take the food and water of life and bring me back my daughter!”

The creatures flew to the underworld and met with Ereshkigal. At first, she was wary of their praises and gifts, but she soon let down her guard and began to enjoy their presence. “You have bought me much happiness” She told them “And for this gift, I shall grant you whatever you ask”

“We request the body of your sister Ishtar” The creatures said in unison.

“Then you shall have it!” Said Ereshkigal, and she ordered her judges to relinquish Ishtar’s body to them.

The creatures flew with Ishtar back to the land of the living, and laying her down on the earth, they fed her the food and water of life, and she was revived. As she awoke, Ishtar’s life force restored the fertility of the barren earth, and the land awoke from the slumber that Tammuz’s death had caused.

The air is developing a chill, taking on its icy aspect as the blanket of winter begins to creep over the land. Soon the days will be short and harsh and the nights long and cold. The wheel is nearing the end of it’s myth cycle and about to begin anew.

Samhain, the ending and the beginning of the pagan year, is coming.

Using a linear concept of time, such as our modern one, most see the new year’s festivities of January 1st as merely a point on a long path that stretches in a straight line from birth to death. A singular point in a singular life.

Within the pagan view, however, time is cyclical. There is no beginning, and no end. Birth and death are turning points on an ever spinning wheel, constantly recurring. The mysteries that await us in the period between death and rebirth, are also a part of this circling framework.

The sabbat of Samhain sits on the cusp of death and rebirth in the natural world. It embodies the mysteries of the afterlife, and is the one night of the year when the veils between this reality and the otherworlds are at their thinnest. It is a night set outside of time, when the natural order of the universe dissolves back into primordial chaos. From this point, one can experience any moment be it past, present or future, making Samhain night perfect for communing with the dead and for divination.

Many cultures have celebrations honouring the dead, and far from being morbid and gloomy undertakings, these festivities are often filled with joy, laughter fun and games. We see it in the dressing up and “Trick-or-treating” of the Americanised Halloween. In Mexico, The Day of the Dead (Día de los Muertos) is filled with feasting and flowers as the people honour their ancestors and celebrate the continuity of life. It is a time of joy and remembrance and in western culture this concept is often lacking.

At Samhain, in the agricultural societies of old, the crops were in, the animals brought in from the fields, and the people battened down the hatches for coming winter. The seeds that were planted at the previous Samhain, that throughout the year sprouted, grew and were harvested at Lughnasad, were ready to be planted anew as a winter crop for the next year - to start the cycle over again.

The people gave thanks to those that went before them, setting extra places at feasts for any who had died that year and lighting torches so that the spirits of departed loved ones could, if they wished, find their way home to celebrate with their families.

Modern pagans utilise this time to meditate of life, death and rebirth. We know that the term “death” does not necessarily have to mean a physical end to a person, animal or plant, but can also refer the death of a situation, a way of life or a mindset. It is a time to look at the things in our lives that we want to put an end to, to clear the slate in order to make a fresh new start. Our rituals reflect this, often including some kind of symbolic ending followed by a rebirth.

We remember our lost loved ones, knowing that they are not gone, but have simply moved on. If we are sad about their passing, we can use this time to put ourselves into state of heightened sensitivity and receptivity, and communicate with them. By assuring ourselves that they are safe, we can let go of the grief cause by their passing, and know that their teachings live on in our hearts and minds.

And so, during the season of Samhain, we are reminded the wonders of this world and the worlds that lie beside it. We look back and celebrate our ancestors, and peer forward to see where our paths may someday lead us. The acknowledgement of our own mortality gives us the ability to perceive this incarnation of our lives for what it is:

Divine and Blessed.

Morning: Woke up way too early for a Sunday if you ask me. My body clock seems permanently set to work mode. Even yesterday morning, after a huge night of drinking and after stumbling in at 5 in the morning covered in fake blood (Thanks Phil), I still woke up at like 11am or something. Had a cracker of a head-splitter thanks to some not so well thought out consumption of tequila, but still managed to stumble round without bumping into much, and only throwing up twice.

This morning , I rolled out of bed at like 8:40, with a terrible feeling that I was late for work. I jumped up and was just about to start getting dressed, when I remembered it was Sunday, and it is my weekend off. So I flopped back down on the bed, figuring on getting a few more hours shut eye. But no chance….I was AWAKE and that’s all there was to it.

I suppose it wasn’t such a bad thing. I was able to get to the supermarket before 11 and had my weekly shopping done in no time thanks to there being hardly any people in woolies. Had some random arse-hat dump some sausages in my trolley whilst I had my back turned, which made me feel like my entire shopping had been contaminated. (Oh dear Goddess, I’m turning into a militant vegetarian!), but I fought off the urge to abandon my shopping and start again, and instead calmly put the sausages back into the display of dead things in the fridge section.

Afternoon: Spent most of this afternoon web surfing, and checking out the msn space of a friend who went traveling. He seems to be having heaps of fun, which makes me terribly aware of how I haven’t been traveling in years (Antarctica January 1999...so long ago!). It also makes me terribly aware of the fact that I can hardly afford to have one night a fortnight out on the town, let alone get my shit together to get overseas. Anyway, that got me to thinking about where I WOULD go, were money not an issue. I think my countries of choice would be: Iceland, Mongolia, Tibet, Brazil (just to see the Amazon), and some of the central African nations.

Evening: Got nothing planned for the evening. Will probably be in front of the computer for a bit, and maybe do a bit of cooking. I was given a bread maker the other day, but unfortunately there were no instructions. I’m sure it’s probably simple as fuck to use, but knowing me, I’ll probably break the smeging thing. I don’t know how I feel about making bread that you don’t knead yourself. That’s always been my favourite part of making bread. Beating the crap out of a piece of dough can sometimes be very cathartic I find. I worry sometimes that if I’m in a bad mood when I make the bread, that I’m going to put a bunch of negative energy into the loaf. Then when I have a sandwich or something, I’ll suddenly feel like smashing something, or abusing someone. THE LOAF OF ANGER! Fear the rage! Pity the poor soul who would consume it, for they shall forever be doomed. Mwahahahah!

Feeling: A mite headachy, which could have something to do with the fact that I consumed 4 cans of V in under an hour, and haven’t had any water all day. This is a bad thing, and I really should try and get over this addiction I have for highly caffeinated and sugary carbonated beverages. He he he, as if. I think the withdrawal headaches I would get coming off caffeine would rival even the best hangover, and would no doubt last for days. There’s something I can do without, thank you very much.

Speaking of caffeine, I finally found some fair traded coffee at woolies (about fucking time!) It’s called “Scarborough Fair Original Blend”, and it’s not bad for an instant coffee.

Listening to: Lisa Germano. A bit of a cross between Bettie Serveert, and Imogen Heap. In my opinion anyway.

Watching: “Geeks in love” Made me giggle

Reading: “Storm Front” By Jim Butcher. My favourite quote so far has to be: “Paranoid? Probably. But just because your paranoid doesn’t mean that there isn’t an invisible demon about to eat your face.”

Art: I’ve just finished watching a Gnomon Workshop DVD about creating unique landscapes using Photoshop. The artist that gives the tutorial, Scott Robertson, now has one new fan. His work is amazing, and he does it seemingly with such ease that I believe that he could put some of the great masters to shame (if of course the great masters were into science fiction and fantasy works). Trying to utilize the ideas he puts forward in the tutorial are a little hard if your like me and are a complete Photoshop spazz, but I have come up with one thing (ok, it’s an abstract unfinished blob) using his layering techniques and by screwing with the colour balances of said layers. In the DVD he uses hand drawn sketches which he then scans. My scanner is crap, so I tried it using interesting texture photos I found on the interweb. I like the image as a basis of something, just not sure what yet. It's pasted below, just click for a larger version.

Food: Made some nori rolls for lunch. Quick and easy yummy food if you ask me. Some rice, lettuce, carrot, cucumber, avocado, Spicy Thai flavoured Tofu all rolled up in some seaweed. I did have some slight singeing on the nasal cavity after I accidentally went overboard with the wasabi on one, but I think a little pain with your nori rolls just lets you know your alive.

Thoughts: I’m so glad I took the time out to clean up the flat the other day. I don’t feel guilty about sitting down and relaxing now. And I feel like it’s home again. It was starting to feel very foreign and was developing an odour that was decidedly on the funky side. I kept giving myself all sorts of excuses for not doing it, and that stretched the time between thorough cleanings to months. Fair enough, my new job does take a lot out of me, but really what kind of excuse is that. If I can get up and go to work and be utterly anal about the way my shop looks, then I should be able to do that in my own home. So now it’s pretty again and full of colour and the smell of incense. My cat is curled up in a ball in the empty washing basket. The afternoon light is pouring through the open blinds and I can hear the neighbour’s kids giggling as they splash about in their little wading pool out on the grass in front of my balcony. A quick glance outside and I can see lorikeets in the tree against the fence. Wollongong is peaceful this afternoon.

Quotes: “I want to stuff you bag with literature” - Gra, making the lending of books sound filthy.

“Well I could do that, but then I would have to kick you in the nuts, and I really don’t have that kind of energy right now” – Me, telling a guy what I thought of his idea that I should show him my boobs.

“Friend: How come my face is on the floor?

Me: Cause your drunk.

Friend: Oh Yeah, I forgot”

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?

“Stranger in a Strange Land” By Robert Heinlein

WHAT TIME IS IT?

7.01pm

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE MAT?

Dolphins, but it's shiny and my optical mouse wont work on it so 

I Have to turn it over and work on the black backing.

 WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE BOARD GAME?

Carroms

YOUR FAVOURITE MAGAZINE?

New Scientist

BABIES?

A race of beings intent on taking over the world!

FAVOURITE SOUND
The first few recognisable bars of a song I know I can sing along to.

WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?

Migraine…..especially one that makes you throw up

FIRST THING YOU THINK OF IN THE MORNING?

Weekdays: “NOOOOOOOOO0000000000ooooooo.”

Weekends: “Might just stay here for a while....”

 
HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?

One or two, if I hear it.

 
FUTURE CHILDS NAME?

Theophilus Distler

FAVOURITE COLOUR?

Por-pull

WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN YOUR LIFE?

Being happy.

FAVOURITE FOOD?

Chickpea satay curry...yum.

IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

I would like to be able to play the guitar better. But if I could

choose any instrument, I’d choose my vocal chords doing what the 

Tuvan Throat Singers do.

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST?

No need for speed. You get where your going if you leave a little

earlier and take it easy. Cars going fast are sacry.

STORMS - cool or scary?

Absolutely awesome! Especially if they do some damage. 

Nature kicks arse!

WHAT TYPE WAS YOUR FIRST CAR?

The first was one I never drove cause it was a load of pants 

when it was given to me and I never had a licence then. It was 

a Mitsubishi L300 Express van.

WHO IS THE ONE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU

COULD GO BACK AND TALK WITH?

My Dad

FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?

Thooeys New

WHAT'S IN THE BOOT OF YOUR CAR?

Lot’s of empty coolant bottles, empty beer bottles, someone else's

dive gear, some stuff to make firesticks with (still gotta find some

Kevlar), a camp chair and a load of miscellaneous junk that I haven’t

gotten around to throwing out.

DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI?

Mmmm yeah, have em raw with a bit of French onion dip. Full of cruncy

broccoli goodness.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED, WHAT WOULD

IT BE?

Volcanologist (hehehe mountain go BOOM) or planetary geologist.

EVER BEEN IN LOVE?

I am right now

IS THE GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF EMPTY?

Half full, you just gotta find the right stuff to fill it with

FAVOURITE MOVIE?

“It’s a wonderful Life” Starring Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed and

Directed by Frank Capra.

DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS?

Hell No! I refuse to be bound by the bourgeois fascists and their typing

rules!

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED?

Lots of dust, probably some books, some boxes that at one stage I

thought would be good to put things in bust have since remained empty.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE NUMBER?

13

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE SPORT TO WATCH?

Power boat racing. The commentators are freakin’ hilarious

SAY AT LEAST ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO

SUPPLIED YOU THESE QUESTIONS?

She is Beautiful, Funny, Quirky, Intelligent and one hell of a drinker!

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING

My twirly new black skirt, cause it's twirly.

BEACH, MOUNTAINS or CITY?

Beach and mountains and no-one else around. I am lucky though, 

I live in a city that is nestled between the beach and some mountains

TECHNOLOGY or ART?

I just got a graphics tab, so I am having immense amounts of fun

combining the two.

COMEDY or HORROR?

Love a good comedy, but chuck in some blood guts and maybe 

a few brain eating zombies and you’ve got the ultimate in entertainment

FAVOURITE TIME OF DAY?

Weekdays: The moment I leave work

Weekends: Sleeping-in time

WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU. STRONG IN MIND OR

STRONG IN BODY?

Strong in mind, a smart person can always outwit a big 

muscly oaf….or at least have the intelligence to know exactly when 

to leg it.

WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?

8am for work and whenever the bloody hell I please on my days off

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE KITCHEN ITEM?

The Microplane

WHAT DO YOU PREFER, A SPORTS CAR or 4wd?

Both are pointless

DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE AFTERLIFE?

I believe in reincarnation cause energy never tires it just changes form.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SEASON?

Winter and spring, cant decide between the two.

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT

BE?

Telekinesis

CAN YOU JUGGLE?

I can juggle at least 8 tabs on my Firefox browser, does that count?

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE DAY?

The first day of any holiday from work, cause it's the longest possible 

time untill I have to go back.

WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI or HAMBURGER?

Sushi, but without the fish or any meat products. So Nori and maki

rolls I guess.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE CARTOON?

I laugh myself sideways at Aqua Teen Hunger Force.

IF YOU COULD TAKE A VACATION ANYWHERE IN THE

WORLD, WHERE WOULD IT BE?

Only in the world? Man that sucks. I wanna go to Mars and climb 

Olympus Mons. But If I had to choose one place to spend some time

I guess I'd head on over to europe and check out the places where 

my family is from (Scotland, England, France) 

You scored as Cultural Creative. Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Cultural Creative

Idealist

Materialist

Postmodernist

Existentialist

Romanticist

Fundamentalist

Modernist

31%
What is Your World View? (updated)
created with QuizFarm.com

I love winter solstice.

Mainly because I love winter. In winter you can snuggle up with a warm blanket in front of a fire or heater and feel all cosy and safe. As I type this, my fingers are cold, reminding me that I am part of the seasons. I feel what is happening, I am conscious of it and therefore I am part of the soul of the moment.  Being cold always reminds me of the sleeping earth and the promise of rebirth. In my heart, when I feel the cold, I know that the chilling breath of winter wont last, and that soon the wheel will turn back to the light of spring and summer and the hope of renewal.

In ancient times, the icy hand of winter was a reminder of the fragility of life, and of us as a species. Winter could kill us if we were unprepared for its rigours. And so, our ancestors spent most of the spring, summer and autumn months gathering supplies that would sustain them through the dark time. So at the coming of the shortest day of the year, the midwinter solstice, it was a time to rejoice. After this day the suns light grew stronger, bringing warmth back to the cold, sleeping earth and making it fertile again. Our ancestors would celebrate with a feast and in doing so would display their faith in the ability of the earth to renew their stores of food.

It was a time of giving gifts, sharing stories with friends and family, and reconnecting with the spirit of community. Our ancestors knew that the months ahead would be filled with hard, physical labour as they again prepared for the next cycles winter, and so they utilised this time to allow themselves to have fun and relax. The re-connection they shared also meant that when the work did begin, their bonds to each other would be strong, making a solid foundation for the teamwork they needed to survive.

In our time of modern conveniences, the struggles of those ancient people seem foreign to us. Most of us need not spend the majority of our year working in the fields to ensure our survival over the winter months. We would hardly ever spend days on end chopping firewood to guarantee our warmth. To us, the idea of stockpiling month’s worth of food in our homes would seem ludicrous. We only need to jump in our cars and make a trip to the supermarket to re-stock our cupboards and refrigerators. So many believe that the true spirit of midwinter solstice has been lost.

But I beg to differ.

I think about what we do during this time and I can see in our behaviours, a commonality with the men and women who lived and struggled thousands of years ago. During winter we ensconce ourselves in our warm homes and rug up in our warmest clothes, just as the ones of old did. We spend a lot of time indoors during the cold months, re-connecting with family and friends, mirroring the spirit of community that our ancestors rejoiced in. And what better way to spend a cold winters evening than with a feast; maybe a roast dinner, with crispy baked potatoes and pumpkins, followed by a warm fruit pie.

And, in the dead of winter, what is the one thing that we all look forward to? The warmth of summer! Those lazy days soaking up the sun, going to the beach, having barbeques into the long afternoons. We all picture it in our minds at some stage during winter, and we smile a little smile, knowing that it is on the way again. And, after midwinters night (TONIGHT!) it is only going to get closer.

The shortest day is over! Bring on the SUN!

So I for one will be spending some time celebrating with a quiet and personal ritual to welcome back the light. To say thank you to the earth for sustaining me and to rejoice in the warmth of the first rays of tomorrow mornings sunlight. I shall feast tonight and will drag myself out of bed, into the chilly pre-dawn at 6 tomorrow, so that I can be down at the local lighthouse to watch the first light of the growing sunrise over the Pacific Ocean.

Happy Solstice!

Lee

I have been working in retail for over 10 years.

Dont worry, even I question my own sanity when I view that statement. But even though it can seem to outsiders that the work is sometimes menial and on quiet days, a little dull, I still keep myself amused and find moments of joy. I like chatting to people and meeting new folk, and what better a way to do that than to put yourself in a position where new people come to you everyday?

In this 10 years of watching people shop, I have witnessed some absolute gems of human kindness, humour, generosity and descency. Some moments that make you happy to be part of this species and in the here and now.

I have also witnessed a few things that have made me shake my head in disblief. things that make me seethe with rage at some people's inherent disrespect for the world outside their own small mind.

Unfortuneately, more often than not, the people that make me feel this way are the parents of young children.

Now, dont get me wrong, I understand that raising children is not easy. Children can get into all sorts of mischeif. They can be a handful, even more so when they get over excited or if they want something.

But what I want parents to understand is that most people who work in the retail outlets that you and your children visit are NOT trained childcare workers. We are not there to entertain you children while you shop and we dont appreciate having to keep an eye on your children so that they dont break/open/spill our products. We want to do our best to help you, we really do, but we cant do that if we are having to chase your kids around for you.

So parents, please, when out shopping with your kids.............

* Keep an eye on them. I know you would love a few minutes to shop for yourself, but you are their guardian and they are your responsibility, not ours.

*Don’t get upset when a shop assistant asks you to pay for something that your child has broken. Yes, we know they are only 4, and they didn't realise that they weren't allowed to touch, but if you had been standing there with them (keeping an eye on them) it wouldn't have gotten broken in the first place.

*Don’t take your child into a toy store/department, or children’s book store/department if you are only going to get cross with them when they pester you to get them something. I mean, what did you expect they would do? Sit quietly in the corner while you look around? I think not.

*Don’t (and this is one of my personal pet peeves) tell your child to "put things back where they got them", then proceed to dump all the items you have decided not to purchase, wherever you please. Not only is this annoying for the staff cause it makes more work for us, but think about the message you are giving to your children. I thought the old "Do as I say and not as I do" adage was well and truly left behind in the 50's. But apparently it seems to be alive and well in the minds of many modern parents. Lead by example people. Your kids love you and they want to be like you so why not show them that you respect other peoples property and work too.

*Don’t yell at/spank your children in the middle of shops because they whine, or touch things, or want you to buy them something. They are only children and you are a fully grown and developed adult. They don’t understand that this is "mummy's/daddy's shopping time". If they are carrying on, take them outside, sit them down and talk to them. There might be another reason to their behaviour that you will never know if you just screech at them. And by the way......... NOBODY deserves physical abuse, especially not children. Spanking your children makes you seem weak willed and cowardly.

*If a shop assistant tells your child to stop doing something, don’t get mad at the staff member. They wouldn't have had to say anything if you were being more attentive to the behaviour of your child. They are only doing their job, part of which is to protect their company's assets which includes the stock and fittings within the store.

*Don’t EVER, EVER ask a shop assistant to watch your kids for you while you just "pop out for a minute". There are so many things wrong with doing this that I don’t even know where to begin. How about, if there was a fire and the place needed to be evacuated, how would we know where to contact you. Or the shop assistant has to turn their back for a moment to serve another customer and something falls on your child. Or, and I cant think of anything worse than this, someone comes in saying they are the child's dad/uncle/relative and leads the child away, never to be seen again. The shop staff don’t want to be put in that position. Remember your responsibility to the safety of YOUR children, and don’t even ask.

It's not hard to have a great shopping experience with your children. I have seen it happen many times: when parents are attentive and show respect, not only for the shop assistants and the stores property, but also for their children.

Lee